i dont even know what to say…
I’m just feeling kinda down lately… that last break with me and face just not talkin really screwed things up… they’re not the same AT ALL!!! and I’m so so so sad about it… And it just kills me these other boys who just care for me so so much and i feel like theres nothin i can do about it.
Like i’ve been clear how i feel and then continue to be swept. Gr.
I don’t wanna fall in love with anyone I know anymore. I wanna love someone I don’t even know.
I want to go somewhere and forget all the other hurts, losses and lies and fall truly in love with someone whose not gonna continue to disappoint me or be obssessed with me.
theres no happy medium and i’m thoroughly exhausted.
AND ITS NOT FAIR
people say you can’t just be good friends with a guy and they not like you and its true. and i hate it. caz i hate when i get jealous when they like someone else. I dont want them, i just don’t want to be not wanted by them. but then I whine and complain when they do like me so much and I can’t stand the uber amounts of attention to where I can’t breathe.
Or at least I think I can’t breathe, but really i can…
my problem is that i don’t want to release my hands from around my own neck
i’m truly discouraged.